Oh rhythm, oh rhythm, why do you flirt so? I’ve told you and I’ll most likely say it a lot more…rhythm and I have a love/hate dislike relationship. We try to understand each other, but it is not something that comes naturally. At the beginning of last week I felt good, like I was making a lot of progress, and then I realized I tried to put in too many new extras into our day… naturally it all started to get a little too overwhelming for me. This is a big transition to be tackling amongst the holidays and all. Yet at the same time, it is the perfect time. A time where I can make little tweaks and changes to where we are and what we do during our days while we are all focusing on some celebrations together. I truly believe that most really good things in life aren’t easy. The easy part resides in your heart when you know that you are following it wherever it is taking you…regardless of the hurdles you may need to get through.
The getting up early thing is easy for me, and at this point is starting to happen by itself with the children. The struggle is following through with an early bedtime. If the kids do not get to bed till 9, then I have to go to bed soon after they do because if I don’t it is so hard for me to get up early the following morning. So here I am, back to focusing on the getting up early/going to bed early part, but that’s okay. So much of this daily rhythm adjusting has to accommodate room for acceptance that not everything is going to run smoothly as planned at all times. Mostly it is all about choosing what my priorities are going to be. When we have a later bedtime and I feel tired, I know it is going to be very important for me to get in bed rather then struggle staying up just so I can get some “me” time. The real thing I am needing in those moments is sleep. Then the next morning I can get up early and get some “me” time and drag those children out of bed and try again the next day.
Last week we were able to get a morning walk together in the morning. We also began to fit in our morning gathering together before we branched off to do some school work. The rest of the day still seems majorly scattered still, but that’s okay. What I am doing is starting with the morning and adding one step of improvement a week to focus on. My mistake last week, was to think that I could also just throw in three structured pupils and manage a toddler in the mix. One thing at a time I need to keep reminding myself. Luckily, since I come from an unschooling train of thought, I am not worried that my kids are going to miss a whole lot of stuff as we ease our way into this. My fifth grader can easily get some work done each day solo, although part of her day usually involves me for a little bit. As for kindergarten and first grade, we are just focusing on the holidays (Advent, Saint Nicholas, Saint Lucia) right now anyways, so easy does it. This is our first year using a curriculum, and it is a very gentle curriculum. My hopes are to get to a point of being able to sit down everyday one on one with each of my children and work with them and just their special selves while interweaving our time together throughout the day. That’s the “extra” part I threw in there last week that put me overboard. But I have to keep reminding myself….one step at a time…with understanding…that this is a journey, not a race. I will get to the solid ground that I am working towards, but for now it’s one. step. at. a. time.
Yesterday we made these little lanterns to light the way for Saint Nicholas so that he could come put a little treat in our shoes. We couldn’t find any hay for his donkey, so the kids left some carrots out instead.
Oh Lisa, you've got it right – one step at a time. It can be so overwhelming. I have taken many steps backwards from trying to do too much too fast. Everything looks so beautiful <3
Those are such wise words! Thank you for sharing them. I'm a new mama and have learned the hard way that going to sleep instead of squeezing in more cleaning, etc. is what I need to do so I have the energy to care for my baby
-Jaime
Oh rhythm. Some days I feel like we have one, just to watch it come crumbling down on my head
. I love rhythm, I chase rhythm, and on the days I catch it there is nothing better, but it is elusive with large families and lots of love of so many different activities. I suppose t he goal is to enjoy the journey to creating a rhythm all our own.
You are so right! December is perfect to practice a little letting go. I absolutely LOVE your practice of letting things pass till their time rolls back around. That is a good thing for me to remember. And congrats!!! On your summer baby to be. What an exciting time for you and your family!
LIsa
I think so much changes when there is more than one child to focus on. So much goodness comes along, but there will always be that mama need for connection for me…I want to be able to connect deeply with all of my children…get in there…know who they are…and let them see how much I love them. It's a challenge, but a worthwhile one.
Lisa
I think the more kids in the mix the more challenges/blessings there are. I find tremendous blessing in the fact that my oldest, now 11, can sit down and do her school work when she needs to by herself, and usually does without too much griping. My challenges lie in my second who wants to be as old as her big sister, but isn't ready…and the two little boys, who all need my attention so much and cannot yet go off and do their lessons or completely occupy themselves when it is most needed. Homeschooling is a lot, having a big family is a lot, but I know that you wouldn't want it any other way! Me neither! We just need to make sure there is lots of room for mama rejuvenation to keep up going!
LIsa
I LOVE the month of December because we take a break. Im not sure what exactly the break means because the rhythm is the same. Its just a state of mind where i don't give myself a hard time I guess. I have found that as far as rhythms go, I do the stuff that is most important right off. That way the rest of the day can be anchored in mealtimes and I do not feel overwhelmed if we get caught up in something. Also, I never go backwards. I have many children in my home for childcare, if we are off track and miss something we move onto where we should be in the days events. So if schoolwork or house work is missed- it has to wait till its turn comes around again. We are having a new baby! and I am so happy that baby will arrive in the summer and give me a few months to live in our summer breeze rhythm before jumping into our autumn rhythm- especially because next year I officially have TWO homeschoolers.
"My hopes are to get to a point of being able to sit down everyday one on one with each of my children and work with them" is so where I am right now. If for only that, with a smile and conscious focus then it's a great day. So with you here.
I am struggling with this sooo much right now – balancing our new little one, with the six others and our very busy business and homeschooling… I appreciate your approach of adding one new thing until the rhythm is established.
Warm wishes to you this beautiful season.